


Strapped

by orphan_account



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, First Time, Gay crisis, M/M, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Porn Video, Size Kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-16
Updated: 2013-11-16
Packaged: 2018-01-01 01:09:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,149
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1038548
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Arthur is low on money and has done all he can think of to get by, but he's close to eviction and needs to think of something else quick. Gwaine suggests he try porn. Willing to do almost anything by this point, Arthur gives in. However when he arrives at the studio, he's asked to do something he never even considered: have sex with another man. Arthur's always been straight as an arrow, and when he starts questioning his sexuality, he begins to panic. Luckily, Merlin, the man he has to have sex with, is patient and understanding. And incredibly sexy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Strapped

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [this](http://kinkme-merlin.livejournal.com/35114.html?thread=37636394#t37636394) Kink Me Merlin prompt. Not entirely sure it's what OP wanted but hopefully it's close enough :)
> 
> Thanks to [dreamlandloner](http://dreamlandloner.livejournal.com/) for the beta.

Arthur had tried calling in old favours, pawning off anything lying around he didn’t need, and even tutoring. None of his friends were able to help (or they suddenly developed a case of amnesia and couldn’t remember who he was), the little money he got from selling old books and antique cameras was nowhere near enough, and he wasn’t smart enough (or patient enough) to make it as a tutor.

The only thing he hadn’t tried yet was whoring himself out. Or selling drugs. But Arthur was _not_ going to do either of those.

“Let’s face it, mate, the only thing you know how to do is give someone a good shag,” Gwaine  said over a pint. “Not that there’s anything wrong with that. There are plenty of businessmen that make it to the top through blind luck and cunning manipulation.”

It took Arthur's hazy brain a minute to work past the praise—he _was_ rather good at fucking, wasn't he?—and on to the second part of Gwaine's sentence. “Are you calling me stupid?” he replied, his words slurring together. He may not have scored that high on his last exam, but he'd had more important matters on his mind. Namely, if he'd have a roof over his head in a few weeks or if he'd be eating the next day.

“If you have to ask...” Gwaine chugged the rest of his lager. Arthur punched his arm but Gwaine seemed not to feel it. “Just listen, will you? You’re a fit blond that likes to fuck, am I right?”

Arthur sighed into his glass. “Yeah, so?”

“So you might as well get paid for doing something you like.”

“I’m not going to become a rent boy, Gwaine.”

“I never said become a rent boy! I’m talking about porn, Arthur. Much safer and much better pay. Just be sure to build up some endurance.”

Arthur had shaken his head and refused at first, but days passed, eviction notices piled up, and Arthur started feeling dizzy all the time from hunger. He was at the end of his rope. He had no choice but to give in and ask Gwaine to sign him up.

&&&&

It was all terribly awkward at first. Arthur had to provide an audition video—he ended up just having a wank on camera, playing with his nipples and moaning to keep it entertaining—and submit it to a couple online sites before someone would even answer his calls. But luckily Gwaine had a few key contacts and was able to help him speed the process along.

Finally, he got a call from the director who told him when to be there and what type of clothes to wear. Arthur walked a few blocks from the bus stop and the building he came to was strangely normal for the set of a porn studio.

Arthur’s hands were sweaty on the lift ride up. He didn’t even know the name of the girl he was going to fuck, or what she looked like. What if he had to say a few cheesy lines at the beginning like in some horrible porn videos? Arthur had never tried to act before.

The lift arrived and Arthur took a deep breath as he stepped out onto the floor. He followed the signs to the suite number and entered with more confidence than he truly felt.

As soon as he walked in, a tall, lanky man talking on his mobile looked him up and down and said, “He’s just walked in...Yeah, yeah I’ll let him know.” He snapped the phone shut and approached Arthur with a friendly smile.

“Hi. I’m Merlin,” he said, extending his hand.

Arthur had to take a step back. Merlin was like a force of nature, all bright smiles and eager tone. Arthur thought immediately of a primary school teacher.

And those lips! Jesus fucking Christ.

“Uh, hi.” Arthur shook the offered hand, tearing his gaze from Merlin's mouth. “I’m Arthur.”

“No, you’re late. And I really hope you swing both ways because the girl we had you paired up with today just cancelled. This way!”

Before Arthur had time to process any of what Merlin had said, Merlin grabbed his arm and led him through the office lobby to the back where the studios were.

Then Merlin’s words _did_ process and Arthur yanked his arm back just as they were about to walk in.

“Wait a minute, what? Please tell me you don’t mean—”

“You don’t, do you? Swing both ways I mean. Shit, he’s not going to like this.” Merlin pulled out his mobile and quickly punched in a code. The other end picked up almost immediately.

“I know, I know, I’m sorry,” he said, no greeting whatsoever. The person on the line must not have wanted to be bothered. “It’s the Pendragon bloke. He’s hetero—What? Um.” Merlin gave him another appraising look up and down. “No, definitely not a chance...Okay.”

Merlin flipped his phone shut with a sigh and slid it back into his pocket. The warm smile and false cheer were gone. “Come back in two months,” he said evenly. He turned away without another word, and Arthur stared at his back getting farther and farther away until he kicked himself into speaking.

“Two _months_? I can’t wait that long!” he shouted after Merlin.

Merlin turned on his heel and shrugged. “Your girl cancelled. Apparently in hospital. She won’t be able to do anything for two months, and nobody else wants to work with an amateur. And you’ve made it quite clear what you prefer to stick your dick into.”

Merlin spun around again and Arthur panicked. He was _not_ going to spend even a single night sleeping on a park bench. “Wait!”

“ _What_?” Merlin sounded irritated.

“It’s...is it just that? Just sticking my dick into something?”

Merlin tilted his head and eyed Arthur curiously, obviously doing some re-evaluating. “I’d have to talk to the director, see what she wants. I just round up the actors. But from what my boss told me, yeah, that’s it. Just a bedroom fuck.”

Arthur swallowed. He couldn’t believe he was about to do this. He didn’t even want to think about this, let alone that millions of other people would get off on watching him do it.

“Okay. I’ll do it.”

Merlin’s brow shot up. “Really?”

Arthur nodded even though every instinct told him to say no. “Yeah.”

“Brilliant! Kilgharrah will be so pleased!”

“Kilgharrah?” Arthur fought off a shudder. Was he really going to have to fuck someone with a weird name like that?

Merlin seemed to have read his thoughts. “My boss.” The bright smile was back full force and Merlin practically skipped back down the hall towards him. He landed on two feet in front of Arthur and opened the door Arthur had been standing by.

“ _Entrer_ ,” he said with a dramatic wave of his arm.

Arthur gave him a sour look but walked in. The studio was indeed set up as a bedroom—a teenage bedroom by the look of it—and there were intimidating cameras standing at attention by the well-lit bed. Arthur’s mouth went dry but he put one foot in front of the other and kept going.

“Finally. At least _someone_ has decided to show up.” An angry brunette approached them, her heels clicking on the tile floor. Arthur recognised her voice from the phone conversation. “Arthur Pendragon, right?”

“Yes.”

The woman looked him up and down, then at her clipboard. Why did everyone keep doing that? “Your girl cancelled. You’re going to have to be paired with another male. You know that, right?”

“Um. Yes.” Arthur would be a bit offended that it was so hard to believe—especially since people were just looking at him and pinning him as straight—but he could hardly believe he was doing it himself. And yet he’d always liked to think of himself as open-minded.

“Hmm. Alright. Merlin will try to find you someone experienced, then. Are those the clothes you’ll be wearing?”

Arthur looked down at his white and green flannel shorts and his black and white, striped v-neck. He’d been told to dress in the fashion of California males; a surfer, essentially, because he was blond and fit the stereotype. He’d had to go out and buy clothes just so he could wear them a few minutes before taking them off on-camera, spending more money he didn’t have.

“Yes,” Arthur said.

Freya studied him a moment longer before nodding at Merlin. Merlin smiled at Arthur and patted him on the shoulder, then trotted off to find Arthur someone experienced to work with.

Arthur suddenly felt more lost and alone than he had in his entire life. Maybe Merlin’s whole  primary-school-teacher-meets-camp-counsellor act was comforting after all.

“—no script,” Freya was saying as Arthur finished lamenting Merlin’s exit. “It’s mostly improvisation, but here’s the premise: The first boy is pacing around his bedroom because he’s been having sexy dreams about his best mate after seeing his cock. Eventually he gives in and starts wanking—which you’re pretty good at, apparently—until his mate comes in. They both know the other is into blokes, so there’s no need for conversation. Just make eye contact with him a few seconds, maybe a little eyebrow raise suggesting an invitation, and then jump right into it.”

It was so much for Arthur to process at one time. He tried to backtrack through everything she’d just said and decipher what it meant for him.

“Am I the first boy or the mate?” he asked.

Freya seemed to hesitate a second, which Arthur decided definitely wasn’t a good sign. “Here’s the thing. The one with the biggest cock, that’s the mate. I mean it wouldn’t make sense for our boy to be daydreaming about some average-sized bloke, would it?”

“But?”

“But all the males we have here, they’re not only more experienced, they’re larger than you, at least from what I observed in your audition video. And since it’s your first time, there’s already a small number of willing people lined up. Most blokes want someone who knows what they’re doing.”

Arthur was starting to catch on, but he was really really hoping he was wrong about what he thought Freya was saying. “So I’m going to get fucked, is what you’re saying,” Arthur clarified.

“Yes.”

Someone’s cock. Was going to be inside him.

Arthur couldn’t even comprehend how anyone could get pleasure from something like that in the first place. Now he was going to have to pretend to enjoy it on camera?

Freya had slipped away to let him panic in peace, and Arthur was starting to consider how hard a park bench might be after all, when Merlin appeared and his warm hand descended upon Arthur’s shoulder and gave him a friendly squeeze.

“There’s, um. A bit of a problem,” Merlin said, frowning. “There’s nobody to...”

Arthur raised his head and looked up at the man next to him, the words Merlin was speaking momentarily fading into the background. Merlin seemed to radiate good vibes and as Arthur’s eyes briefly scanned Merlin’s features, he found himself lingering again on the pink lips forming words Arthur couldn’t hear. Wondering if those lips were as soft as they appeared, Arthur idly thought that if he had to get intimate with anyone here, he’d rather it was Merlin.

The thought surprised him. Arthur quickly looked away and hoped he wasn’t blushing.

Luckily, Merlin didn’t seem to be aware of Arthur’s silent appraisal. In fact, he leaned more of his weight on Arthur’s shoulder and tilted his head so he was looking mischievously down at Arthur.

“But look, I’ll talk to Freya—”

“Merlin!”

Merlin’s head snapped up at the sound of his name and Arthur followed Merlin’s gaze to see Freya heading their way. She grabbed Merlin’s arm and pulled him aside to talk to him.

Left alone, Arthur looked down to his sweaty hands and wiped them on his shorts. He tried to get the phantom image of Merlin’s plump lips out of his brain. When he closed his eyes to try and imagine something else, it only got worse. He saw clear as day the curve of Merlin’s jaw, and the smooth skin of his neck. He saw the defined jut of an Adam’s apple and felt a sudden rush of blood go to his groin when he briefly imagined feeling it pulse beneath his tongue.

Arthur snapped his eyes open and looked around guiltily. Even though it had felt otherwise, nobody knew what was going through Arthur’s mind. With another glance at his hands, Arthur found he was trembling, and he was certain it wasn't hunger this time. Flashes of Merlin kept twirling around in his head and he felt like he couldn’t breathe, and he was getting _hard_ , and he was shaking, he was shaking...

 _Oh my God, you want to fuck Merlin,_ his thoughts told him. _You want him, you want him so badly you don’t know what to do with yourself!_

 _No, I...I don’t. I don’t! It's just the situation that's got me wondering and confused and...I don’t like blokes and I definitely don’t like_ Mer _lin._

 _You do, you do! You want his mouth on your cock, you want to hear him moan, you want to feel his hands grab you_ —

_Oh God, stop stop stop_

Arthur put his head in his hands and groaned. He tried to block out the images but they were flooding in now—Merlin licking his lips and grinning wickedly as he undid the zip of Arthur’s shorts; Merlin’s mouth open in a lewd “O” of pleasure because Arthur touched him just right; Merlin sinking to his knees and grabbing fistfuls of Arthur’s arse as he lunged forward to take Arthur’s cock; Merlin’s long, dark eyelashes sweeping delicately through the air as he closed his eyes and _sucked_.

“Arthur?”

Arthur’s eyes flew open and he was dismayed to find Merlin standing in front of him looking worried.

“Freya said...” Merlin blushed and rubbed the back of his neck. He looked sideways and down, suddenly timid, not at all how he'd been before. “She thinks it would be a good idea if I were the one to do the scene with you. Because, um. Of how large I am? And apparently I’m friendly and not so intimidating.”

Arthur’s heart raced from nerves. That’s what it was, just nerves. “Do you not want to?” he asked. “I mean obviously you’re, well...”

Merlin’s eyes sparkled with laughter. “Pansexual?”

“Yes.”

“The problem isn’t that I don’t want to,” Merlin assured him with a slight smile. “I mean, come on, you’re bloody gorgeous.” He gestured to Arthur—his chest, specifically, it seemed—with another blush, then froze when his eyes landed on what was surely Arthur’s crotch.

Arthur felt his face heat and tried to stand in a way that would make his erection less noticeable. He tried to look everywhere else but Merlin, but he could only keep it up for so long. Eventually his gaze went back to where Merlin’s lips were still parted in surprise and his cock betrayed him by twitching with interest.

“Oh Christ, Arthur,” Merlin said finally, his expression gone soft. He stepped closer and put a gentle hand on Arthur’s arm. “Look, you wouldn’t be the first to—”

Arthur flinched away and glared at him. “Don’t touch me,” he hissed, because he wanted Merlin to touch him.

Merlin took it in stride and nodded, retreating a step back. “You’ve got two options,” he said flatly, all business once again. “Either come back in two months when we’ve got a girl for you, or stay and do the scene with me. It’s your decision, Arthur.”

Putting it like that helped. Arthur realised he needed to think about this logically. If, _maybe_ , he wanted to...do things with Merlin...he had to think about what that meant about him, what it meant about his whole life. And that scared the shit out of him.

The reasonable thing to do would be to at least try. He wouldn’t know if this was really his thing unless he experimented, right? And in this case, he was being _paid_ to. He technically had nothing to lose. The only thing holding him back was himself.

“Does it hurt?” Arthur found himself asking.

Merlin’s mouth twitched as he obviously held back a grin. “Being fucked?”

Arthur rolled his eyes. “Yes, being fucked.”

“At first, sort of. With me, most certainly.”

“Brilliant.” Though to be honest, had Arthur really expected any less?

Confident that Arthur was at least somewhat tolerant of proximity now, Merlin laid a reassuring hand on Arthur’s shoulder. Arthur didn’t flinch this time. He let himself indulge in Merlin’s touch, getting used to the idea of maybe possibly liking it.

“We won’t just jump into it, you know. There’s...preparation and stuff. And then it’s great.”

Arthur sure hoped so. It had to be if so many people around the world did it every day.

“Have you ever done this before?” Arthur asked. "Acted?"

Merlin shook his head. “Not even once. But I’ve watched a lot and I know what they’re looking for. Just follow my lead and you should be fine.”

Arthur swallowed. He couldn’t believe he was going to do this. He couldn’t believe he couldn’t _wait_ to do this.

“Alright. I guess I’m as ready as I’ll ever be,” he said.

“Brilliant. I’ll go tell Freya.”

&&&&

It started with Arthur pacing the bedroom.

He bit his thumbnail as he turned over new, scary thoughts in his mind. He didn’t know the first thing about being attracted to males. Each time his hand brushed his erection, he felt a guilty pleasure at imagining what it’d be like for someone else’s hand to touch him—someone else’s strong, firm hand, laced with veins that led upwards to muscular arms.

After a few minutes, Arthur gave in to temptation. He sat on the edge of the bed with a resigned sigh and began undoing the zip of his shorts. His hard cock was an obscene bulge through the fabric, making the green lines in the flannel pattern curve along his length. He was liberal with his touches, moaning at the blessed friction he finally allowed, before pushing the garment to his knees.

The part of him that wasn’t mentally invested in the scene knew Merlin was watching not six metres away. He fought the urge to look up, past the camera, and into Merlin’s eyes, eyes that must surely be zeroing in on where Arthur’s hand dipped below the waistband of his pants.

Arthur felt something shift inside him. Now that he’d started this, he realised there was no turning back. Even if this was just a well-paid experiment, even if it ended up meaning nothing, this was _happening_. He was thinking about Merlin; he was thinking about Merlin’s cock; he was _liking it._

As he began ridding himself of his shorts entirely, his hands started to tremble. Freya had to whisper “Slow” for him to keep himself in check. He wanted these clothes off, he wanted to get to the good bit.

He was supposed to keep his pants on, draw this out as long as possible. He spread his legs until each knee touched the side of the bed and lay back, staring past the overhead lights at the shadowy rafters of the studio above. He took a deep breath as he began to slowly fist his cock. He let more thoughts of Merlin tumble into the forefront of his mind. He felt himself get even harder.

“That’s good, Arthur, now can you just touch yourself a little? Maybe squeeze your nipple?” Freya whispered.

Arthur kept his irritation from showing and did as she asked. He ran a hand up his shirt, raising the fabric as he went, and pinched his left nipple between his thumb and forefinger. A bolt of pleasure shot straight to his cock and he gasped, his hips jerking upwards into his tight fist.

His exhale was shaky and he could barely fight the need to quicken his pace. It didn’t help that in fighting his urge, he tightened his grip, and only brought himself unintentionally closer.

“Easy there, mate,” Freya warned as Arthur’s body began to visibly tremble. Arthur removed his fingers from his nipple, caressed down the front of his chest, and relaxed his hold on his cock. He slowly let his free hand drift lower to cup his balls and give a gentle, teasing squeeze.

Another moan escaped from low in his throat. He figured this was slow enough, that now he could take off his pants and toss them over the bed for better access to his skin. He moved his hand from his balls up the inside of his thigh and back again, teasing himself with slow, languid caresses that felt more like a lover’s touch than anyone had ever given him. Merlin came to mind once again.

“Lift your legs a bit....There you go. We need to see your arse...Good, good. Now just let a finger sneak in...”

Arthur swallowed and dared to do as Freya directed. He didn’t push; he just let the tip of his forefinger pull and tease and trace at the puckered rim. Little spikes of discomfort burst through the waves of pleasure and Arthur found himself testing how much farther he could go. He brought his finger to his mouth, gave it a quick wet suck, and went back down to tease himself some more. The instant his finger slipped the tiniest bit inside, he gasped.

It was...weird, but not unpleasant. Curiosity made him raise his head and look between his spread legs where part of his finger disappeared inside. Arthur felt his face heat with blush. He looked so dirty, so utterly _wanton_. It made his heart race anew and he pushed a little further in to test his limits.

It became uncomfortable at the first knuckle. That's when Arthur retreated a little and pushed back in. When that didn't feel as good as he thought it would, he swivelled his finger around in circles, and that...that brought forth the third moan.

He didn't hear what Freya said, but the next thing he knew, Merlin was entering the set from the false door on the side. Arthur sprung up and pulled down his shirt to hide himself.

Merlin looked wrecked, like he'd run a marathon, and was gasping from exertion. In the back of his mind, Arthur knew Merlin wasn't supposed to look this way, not yet, since the nonexistent script called for him to be only just finding Arthur. The main portion of his mind though, was focused on how badly he wanted Merlin in the bed with him right the fuck now.

 _Two gay blokes that make eye contact and want each other_ , Arthur reminded himself. It wasn’t entirely difficult to look at Merlin as though he wanted him. He let the tension build between them, their audience seeming to disappear altogether, then slowly pulled his shirt off, revealing the erection that was meant solely for Merlin, cameras or no. He was completely naked and ready for Merlin to do with him whatever he wished. His skin tingled with built up energy.

Merlin pulled his own shirt over his head as he kicked his shoes off. He had a spattering of dark hair over his chest, and peaked pink nipples where Arthur was used to full breasts, but Arthur found himself wondering what Merlin’s skin would feel like beneath his hands regardless. As Merlin walked closer, hands undoing his jeans, Arthur felt his stomach flip in anticipation. He watched with bated breath as the hair leading down from Merlin's navel was revealed with each passing second.

Unlike Arthur’s slow stripshow, Merlin undressed quickly. He had both his pants and his jeans around his ankles with one swift movement. And Arthur’s world was promptly turned upside down.

The first immediate reaction was shock. How in the hell did a twiggy thing like Merlin have such a huge cock? Arthur hadn’t even thought something like that was possible.

After the first few fleeting thoughts, the second reaction hit Arthur: Merlin was beautiful. He was pale, lanky, all elbows and knees, but there was a grace about him that was simply mesmerising. Arthur wanted to get his hands on him, to feel Merlin’s skinny limbs wrapped around him.

But most of all, he wanted to know what Merlin’s cock would feel like in his hand—assuming he could even fit his hand around something that thick—and he was mortified to find his mouth watering the longer he stared.

His third reaction: _How the hell is that monster of a cock going to fit inside me?_

Arthur didn’t have long to evaluate Merlin’s physique though, and the total span of time that passed was actually only about seven seconds. Soon Merlin was upon him, pushing Arthur back roughly— _Oh right, we’re supposed to be desperate_ —and straddling him, kissing him full on the lips without warning.

Arthur’s head was reeling but his body seemed to know what it wanted. His hands reached up and pulled Merlin closer, his hands splaying flat on Merlin’s back. He felt Merlin’s cock brush his stomach, and arched his spine unthinkingly, wanting more of that heated touch. Merlin moaned against his lips and took the opportunity to grind down onto him.

Just as Arthur parted his lips to dart his tongue out—because he had to know what Merlin’s mouth tasted like—one of Merlin’s hands came between them and wrapped around both their cocks, stroking slowly, rhythmically, even as their kiss deepened. Arthur never would have guessed Merlin, who was all smiles and boyish charm, would be so coordinated, so talented at making Arthur putty in his hands.

But then Merlin moaned again, low and guttural, and Arthur felt the sound vibrate through him, sparking little electric pulses of desire across his skin. It was so different from anything he’d heard before, wasn’t at all a high-pitched whine, or a feminine sigh.

And that was definitely a cock rubbing against his own that was adding to the fire in his groin.

 _Don’t have a gay crisis on camera, Arthur_ , he told himself as his breathing sped up. _Pull yourself together for fuck’s sake._

The best thing to do would be to not think about what this could mean. He should just give in to his desires, to the pleasure that came from skin against skin, no matter how rough...and perfect.

Maybe Merlin could sense the slow panic rising in Arthur, or maybe it was for the cameras, but either way, the hand that was stroking them both retreated to move upwards and caress Arthur’s side. It was soft in contrast to the movement of Merlin’s hips and his dominating kiss, and soothing at the same time. Arthur felt himself relaxing, his breathing settling back to normal.

That calmness was fleeting however, as Merlin began kissing down Arthur’s torso, nipping skin between his teeth to tease gently. No woman had ever done that to him, that was for sure. Nobody had ever given his chest so much attention. He couldn’t believe how pleasurable it was, how much _better_ it was to be taken care of like this. He arched up, offering himself to Merlin.

Having his cock sucked—that was definitely something he’d experienced before, but not quite like this. Girls in the past had usually done it out of some feeling of obligation. In fact, Arthur had often felt he was asking too much when giving it to them. But Merlin...when Merlin’s mouth finally got to Arthur’s cock, it was like he was claiming a prize. Merlin was careful with it, kissing it lovingly and tonguing the side with long, slow swipes of his tongue. Arthur had to fight not to come right then, it was so damn sexy. When Merlin’s eyelashes fluttered up and he looked at Arthur heatedly, eyes blown black with lust, Arthur nearly erupted again.

It was everything Arthur’s sinful mind had imagined when he’d fallen to obsessing over Merlin’s lips. When Merlin finally puckered his mouth over the tip and slid down, Arthur found himself moaning, loud and unchecked. The inside of Merlin’s mouth felt like the inside of anyone else’s, hot and wet, but at the same time it was so different. Mostly it had to do with what Merlin was doing with his tongue. If only the cameras could see _that_.

Every passing second was a struggle. Merlin looked positively wicked with his hollowed cheeks, the cheekbones jutting out even more emphatically from his face. The sounds he was making—hungry, satisfied sounds of immense pleasure, even though _he_ was the one giving the blow job—made Arthur’s skin seem to vibrate and his veins pump liquid fire. Even after Arthur closed his eyes, the hum around his cock nearly pushed him over the edge multiple times.

At last, the sweet torture stopped, and Arthur exhaled heavily. He opened his eyes, the studio’s lights momentarily blinding him, and looked down to see Merlin licking his chapped, swollen lips. There were two cameramen, one at Arthur’s shoulder and another beside Merlin, and Arthur remembered suddenly where he was, what he was doing and why.

Then Merlin spoke, his voice hoarse and low. “I’m going to prepare you now, okay?”

As if on cue, one of the cameramen handed Merlin a packet of lube. Merlin took it without taking his eyes off Arthur, which Arthur would have found a bit funny if he wasn’t about to have a giant cock shoved up his arse.

“They usually cut this bit out, so I’ll talk you through it, alright? Can you get on your knees for me?” he went on, one hand caressing the inside of Arthur’s thigh. “If I’m hurting you too much, let me know.”

Arthur swallowed and nodded. “Okay.” He rolled onto his stomach, then pushed up onto his knees, his forearms holding up his upper body. He felt more vulnerable than ever before, offering his arse to someone like this.

Arthur had already had one finger inside himself, but that had been his own. It was different, stranger, when it was someone else’s. If it was anyone else but Merlin—who was still caressing him and whispering words of encouragement—Arthur would have felt invaded.

“Okay, just bear with me now,” Merlin said before slowly adding a finger beside the first.

It fucking burned. Arthur gasped and his arse clenched instinctively, only making it harder for Merlin to press inward. Even as Merlin pulled free a little and tilted his fingers at different angles to stretch the rim, it still felt wrong, so utterly against nature, against what should normally happen when something was up there. Arthur’s hands fisted the duvet as he fought to gain control of himself.

Arthur began to spiral into panic again. The fact that the addition of a single digit could change everything so quickly was shocking. And Arthur was nearly distraught when he realised this little pain would be nothing compared to Merlin’s cock, the image of which was still burned into Arthur’s memory.

“I need you to relax, Arthur,” Merlin said softly. He nosed Arthur’s balls, like a dog pushing his toy towards its owner in the hopes that they’ll be rewarded with playtime. “Come on, it won’t get any better if you’re all tense.”

Arthur tried to relax. He took deep breaths and focused on turning his limbs to jelly, no matter how unnatural it felt.

“There you go,” Merlin praised, his fingers sliding forward a bit more. Arthur noticed it was a much easier entry than before, and Merlin fingers could manoeuvre—

“Oh God, _fuck_!” Arthur shouted, his relaxation shattered as Merlin touched something inside him that made his vision blur. It was the first burst of pleasure he’d experienced since Merlin’s mouth left his cock. “What was—”

“That would be your prostate,” Merlin explained, his smile evident in his voice. Merlin wiggled his fingers again, touching that same spot, and Arthur gasped.

Arthur had heard of it, of course. He didn’t live under a rock, and he knew there were medical exams for it. But he’d never thought...He couldn’t wrap his mind around the concept, and wasn’t sure he even cared to do it now. All he knew was that he wanted Merlin to keep touching him there.

Then he heard a few snickers from off to the side, and realised it was one of the faceless cameramen. Arthur felt a mixture of anger, shame, and embarrassment flow through him. He could only imagine how he must look to these professionals, a straight bloke new to everything and having to be calmed by Merlin.

Merlin pointed at the cameraman and snapped his fingers once. “You! Stop that or I’ll call Kilgharrah. I’ve had someone fired for harassing an actor before and I won’t hesitate to do it again.”

“Apologies,” the man mumbled.

Merlin’s jaw set as he grit his teeth in irritation. He wet his lips and turned back to the task at hand.

“Sorry,” he said to Arthur. “Can I keep going?”

Arthur, dumbstruck and grateful, nodded.

He was relieved to find that things had begun to go a bit more smoothly. Merlin’s fingers slid in and out more easily, and though it still felt a bit strange, it wasn’t uncomfortable. When Merlin’s fingers scissored and twisted, stretching Arthur’s hole while also sending sparks of pleasure up his spine, Arthur found himself actually enjoying the process. He realised with surprise that at some point he’d started pushing back in an effort for Merlin to go deeper.

Arthur barely noticed when a third digit slid in beside the first two. He suspected his rim was stretching more easily because of how relaxed he’d finally let himself be. It had begun to resemble what a cock would feel like, and Arthur was surprised to find that the idea wasn’t entirely loathsome to him anymore. He still didn’t see how it might be enjoyable, but he was curious to know what it’d feel like all the same.

Then Merlin pushed in his smallest finger. “Four, Merlin?” Freya’s voice asked from the dark area of the studio.

“Trust me, Arthur needs four if he’s going to take me smoothly,” Merlin replied. This time when the cameramen laughed, Merlin didn’t snap at him. One of them tossed a condom onto the bed.

When Merlin’s fingers suddenly left all at once, Arthur’s arse instinctively clenched around nothing but air. He felt empty, strangely so, like something _should_ be there but wasn’t. Merlin’s hands came down to knead Arthur’s arse, spreading the cheeks apart and only emphasising the feeling of emptiness as air passed over his exposed, stretched hole.

 _Fill me up, dammit,_ Arthur inwardly growled. He was immediately horrified. That wasn’t...He didn’t really mean that, did he? He didn’t really want it so badly, right? His body wasn’t shaking because he...because he _needed_ Merlin to fuck him. No, he was just hungry again. He didn’t _want_ this, he was just curious...

Arthur turned his head to look over his shoulder, wondering what was taking Merlin so long. He saw himself reflected in the lens of the camera right behind Merlin, presumably zooming in on his arse while the other was off to the side waiting for Merlin to enter.

Merlin’s hands massaged Arthur a little more, and Arthur realised the touch was meant to be soothing, but all it was doing was making Arthur desperate.

“Ready?” Merlin asked.

Arthur glanced down to Merlin’s cock, where it was still just as hard and large as ever, only now covered with a lubricated condom. Taking a deep breath, Arthur nodded.

Arthur turned his head back to face forward as one of Merlin’s hands held Arthur’s hip. Merlin’s knees nudged Arthur’s a little further apart, and then Arthur felt it, the blunt head of Merlin’s cock pressing against his entrance.

Even after all the preparation, Arthur realised it wasn’t nearly enough. As Merlin pushed deeper, Arthur began to tremble, and soon he felt like he was being split open. He inhaled through his teeth, the hissing sound almost like a whistle in the air. He wasn’t sure how his arse hadn’t ripped and started bleeding, but he didn’t feel any blood dribbling down, so it must have been alright despite the pain.

“You okay?” Merlin asked, caressing his side again.

Arthur was about to nod, determined to take this like every other challenge he’d faced. But at the last second he shook his head. “No. I need...I need a minute.”

Merlin didn’t reply with words, but with touches. His hands were everywhere: Arthur’s thighs, up and down Arthur’s back, on his arse, slowly stretching Arthur’s hole where his cock was half buried inside. Arthur had to give the man some credit; he knew how hard it was not to just shove all the way in when faced with such sweet, clenching heat. And if the pain was any indicator, Arthur’s arse must have been incredibly tight from Merlin’s perspective.

“O-Okay,” Arthur said, a few minutes later, after the burn had receded substantially. “Go ahead.”

Merlin pushed forward, his cock inching deeper inside. Arthur was relieved to find that it didn’t hurt nearly as much, not now that he’d got used to it, but that wasn’t to say the stinging sensation was entirely gone. It was just barely tolerable.

Arthur knew when Merlin was fully buried, not only because of Merlin’s exhalation of breath from behind him, but also because he could feel Merlin’s balls against his own. Arthur was hit with another moment of shock: he, Arthur Pendragon, had another man’s cock inside him. Not just inside him, but filling him up so much he felt he was bursting, like everything in the world seemed to come back to that single point of connection.

He had not expected to feel a sense of accomplishment.

He had not expected that it would be him to make the first move and start rocking back onto Merlin’s cock before Merlin could ask if he was ready.

It wasn’t a fast tempo he set, of course. It was still mostly curiosity, wondering how the whole in-out-in-out felt from this side. He went slow, traces of pain still lingering even then, and he and Merlin quickly settled into a rhythm. Arthur had fucked enough women to know that he was being treated gently, that the roll of Merlin’s hips was meant to result in an angling of his cock that pleased not only Merlin, but Arthur too. Arthur let his head hang between his shoulders as Merlin fucked him, breathing slowly. Every so often he’d push his arse back harder against Merlin, forcing Merlin’s cock to go deeper and surprising a moan out of him.

When Merlin started increasing the speed, Arthur thought it was about fucking time. It was usually by this time that he’d be pounding into a girl by now, and Arthur had been getting a bit impatient waiting for Merlin to get there. To show Merlin just how ready he was, he reached back and placed a hand on the back of Merlin’s thigh, urging him to go faster and harder, that he _could_ , in fact, take it. He _wanted_ to take it.

Merlin surprised him, however. He pushed Arthur down onto the bed roughly, Arthur’s newly hardened cock trapped beneath him, and began fucking him in earnest. Arthur’s face was pressed against the mattress, and Merlin’s entire weight was holding him down. Merlin’s monster of a cock continued to penetrate him, and slid between Arthur’s arse where the cheeks were more firmly squeezed together. Arthur couldn’t push back no matter how badly he wanted to.

And he did want to. He wanted to indulge himself on Merlin’s dick, take it as deep inside him as humanly possible and then some. As Merlin’s cock hit the perfect angle, making Arthur’s vision go white at the edges, Arthur screamed in pleasure loud enough to drown out Merlin’s low grunts.

How had he thought this might not be pleasurable? Why had no one told him how fucking amazing it felt? How could he have ever thought this would be anything less than spectacular?

All of a sudden Merlin’s deceptively strong hands were at his shoulders, positioning him on his side. Arthur barely noticed the cameras, and how good of an angle they’d have of Merlin’s cock driving into him now. He only knew that his whole body was aflame with pleasure and if he wasn’t careful, he’d come soon, untouched. Arthur reached behind him and grabbed a fistful of Merlin's hair, anchoring himself.

Merlin was most decidedly not being gentle anymore. He was pounding into Arthur with a force that Arthur wouldn’t have expected from the man, holding onto Arthur's body tightly as he thrust his cock in time with his gasps. The fact that Merlin hadn’t come yet was also a surprise. He certainly had more stamina than Arthur.

Just as part of Arthur's mind began to wonder what Merlin thought about all this, Merlin’s hand lowered and wrenched Arthur’s legs apart, putting his bouncing cock on display for the camera. Arthur could hear the lens of the camera zooming even over the loud slap of thighs.

“Do you think you can get on top, Arthur? Ride him a bit?” Freya asked after a few minutes of heavy panting and an intense struggle not to come.

Arthur found himself nodding before she even finished. He had to look Merlin in the eyes, had to know if Merlin felt even half of what he felt. “Yeah, sure.”

“Great. Go ahead.”

Arthur—loathe though he was for Merlin’s cock to leave him even for a second—let Merlin slip from him so he could straddle him.

Merlin lay on his back, eyes a bit wide as he got used to the new position. He moved as if to help but Arthur shook his head. Arthur placed his knees on either side of Merlin’s body and reached behind him to hold Merlin’s cock in place. He knew how to do _this_ at least, since he’d seen girls do the very same thing with him. This time when Merlin’s cock slid inside, it was nothing but immense pleasure. He could see it mirrored in Merlin's eyes, in the way his lips remained parted as he breathed through his mouth.

Straddling Merlin, Arthur felt like he had all the power, the way he usually did during sex. He was used to this feeling, of being in control. He was not used to sitting on a cock though, and he experimented with it, twisting his body, rolling his hips, and taking what he needed to get the perfect feeling. Merlin’s cock seemed to go deeper like this, too. If Arthur pressed a hand to his stomach, he could feel Merlin penetrating him. Catching Merlin's eye, he saw Merlin was biting his lip, but also seemed amused.

Experimentation over, Arthur launched into it. He lifted himself up and dropped back down, carefully enough not to hurt Merlin with his weight. He ran his hands up the pale expanse of Merlin’s chest, delighted at how hot the skin was to the touch, how right it felt to drag his nails down Merlin’s torso, to not have to worry about being too rough. And he started to bounce.

From this position, Arthur could take in every aspect of Merlin in the heat of the moment. Merlin’s eyes were so dark they were almost consumed with black, and they stared up at Arthur as though Arthur were the most amazing thing in the world. The way Merlin’s lips formed a plump little “o,” his lips, his fucking _lips_ that had been stretched over Arthur’s cock, _fuck_...Arthur increased his speed, setting a tempo that had his cock slapping Merlin’s belly.

“You like it?” Merlin asked breathlessly, his hands falling to cup Arthur’s arse. The furrow of his brow seemed to indicate it was a real question.

“Y-Yes,” Arthur sighed in reply, his head falling back and his eyes sliding shut. He was so blissed out he would have said yes to murder.

“You like me fucking you?”

“ _Yes_.”

There was a brief pause and then Merlin’s tone shifted to one more commanding. “Tell me to fuck you.”

Arthur moaned. “Fuck me.” Was that him? Did his voice really sounded so wrecked and pleading?

Merlin snapped his hips upwards, hitting Arthur’s prostate with abusing force. “Tell me to fuck you!” he growled.

“Oh God, _God_ , fuck me, fuck me, _fuck_!” Arthur sobbed. He was sure he was going to come, he could feel his balls drawing up tight—

“Hold him!” he heard Freya yell. Instantly, Merlin’s hand wrapped around the base of his cock and stopped his orgasm. Arthur cried out from being denied release.

After Merlin was sure Arthur wouldn’t spill a second too soon, he sat up and pushed Arthur onto his back, surprising Arthur again. For someone who’d said he’d never done this before, Merlin was certainly talented at switching into new positions smoothly.

Merlin's hands gripped Arthur's thighs, holding Arthur in place while he pistoned into him. He fucked hard and fast, air hissing between his teeth as he breathed. On his back like this, Arthur felt helpless. How did he look, he wondered, with his limbs sprawled out and flailing as he got so thoroughly buggered? Did he look as wonderfully dirty as all those girls he'd fucked this same way?

Arthur could see a layer of perspiration forming across Merlin's face, his expression one of concentration. He could tell from Merlin's rhythm that he was just as desperate to finish as Arthur. His cock had started retreating shorter distances, attempting to plunge deeper despite the impossibility. Arthur was so incredibly full and satisfied he could cry. Merlin was huge and ever-present and taking up all his senses. He'd never known a feeling like this.

"You gonna come?" Merlin asked, so breathlessly Arthur thought he might have imagined it. But his eyes had caught Arthur’s and was staring deeply into them.

"Yeah," Arthur replied, voice so embarrassingly wrecked that it was raspy. Merlin _knew_ Arthur was close. Arthur realised belatedly that Merlin was only asking in order to put on a show for the cameras. He found he didn't really mind.

"I _said_ ," Merlin repeated with a growl, thrusting hard enough to bring black spots to Arthur's vision. "Are you gonna come?"

Arthur couldn’t hold back any longer. "Yes, yes, fuck, yes!" he cried. Instantly, his pleasure peaked and his cock erupted, thick white strings of come painting his chest as his spine arched. Arthur's entire body turned molten inside, and he was dizzy with ecstasy. He was fairly certain he'd never had such a satisfying orgasm.

Before he knew what was happening, Merlin had pulled out, leaving Arthur with a painfully aching emptiness, and was straddling Arthur's hips. He ripped off the condom and started stroking his own cock so fast his hand was a pale blur.

Arthur whimpered and was momentarily distracted from the throbbing rim of his arse. Merlin looked fucking delicious like that, all grim determination and eagerness to come.

Arthur was just contemplating raising his hand to finish Merlin off himself, still wondering how someone else's cock would feel in his palm, when Merlin suddenly bit his lip and stilled his motions. He came over Arthur's chest, adding to the mess already there. Arthur felt the best kind of filthy as Merlin's hot semen hit his skin.

"Alright, excellent," Freya praised, entering the scene as the cameramen left and Merlin collapsed onto the bed with a huff. She tossed Arthur a cloth and Arthur blinked up at her, still slightly dazed. "You both did brilliantly considering the circumstances."

Merlin grunted, evidently still tired from expending so much energy. Arthur regained some of his senses and picked up the cloth beside him to wipe his chest before the come could dry uncomfortably.

But Arthur didn’t even hear the rest of what Freya was saying. He lay there, staring in a haze at the dark rafters of the studio, purposefully not letting himself think about what just happened, or how the burning ache in his arse was a constant reminder of what he'd just had done to him, something he'd never even considered before. When Merlin nudged him and motioned for him to follow, he stood up and walked behind Merlin to an adjacent room with a shower.

Stepping under the spray, Arthur felt lost. He’d just lost his arse virginity, and he’d liked it. He’d _really_ liked it. Despite how much he was hurting now, he maybe even wanted it to happen again.

No, no more maybes. He was done with that. He definitely wanted it to happen again.

But...he was scared. He didn’t know where to go from here. As he watched Merlin bathe beside him, soapy water dripping down his skin, Arthur realised he didn’t care where he went, as long as Merlin was there.

“You okay?” Merlin’s voice startled him out of his thoughts. “You seem...out of it. I know it probably still hurts.”

Arthur raised his eyes to Merlin’s and found they were staring at him with unchecked worry. His black eyelashes were shiny wet from the water and his hair was curling around the ends. Arthur had to force himself not to drop his gaze to Merlin’s lips.

“I...I’m a little dazed,” Arthur said.

“I guess that’s only to be expected,” Merlin replied, turning away with a sigh. He moved his arm up into an awkward angle, struggling to wash between his shoulder blades.

Arthur’s hands came up instinctively and he took the soapy cloth from Merlin. “Here, let me.” Merlin looked at Arthur a second before nodding and offering up his back.

Even though Arthur’s hands were trembling—here was another new experience, washing another’s man back—he managed to get the job done efficiently. His fingers wanted to linger over Merlin’s skin, rub over the protruding bones of Merlin’s spine and shoulders, but he forced himself to simply wipe the cloth back and forth. As soon as it was done, he cleared his throat and handed it back to Merlin.

But Merlin’s hands kept hold of him, stopping him from pulling away. “Are you sure you’re okay? I didn’t...embarrass you, did I? I know I...I made you...”

“Beg like a wanton whore?” Arthur finished, smirking. “No, I’m fine with that. I mean, it _is_ porn, yeah? Like you said, you know what they want.”

Merlin seemed to see through Arthur’s temporary facade of confidence. “There’s something else, though.”

_Yeah, there is. I fucking want you and I don’t know what to do about it._

Arthur slid his hand free of Merlin’s and looked away. “I think...Well, I mean, I _know_...I’m not exactly as straight as I thought, obviously. And you seem to know a lot, and even though you’re certainly not obligated to do any follow up, being my first gay experience and everything...I mean, maybe it’s _because_ you’re my first that I feel like this, but—”

“Want to get some dinner after this?”

Arthur opened and closed his mouth a few times before he could properly comprehend what Merlin was asking him. Merlin, thankfully, waited patiently for a reply. “I, um. Yes.” Arthur cleared his throat. “Yeah, dinner would be great.”

“Cool.”

Arthur had just remembered that he was short on money and was beginning to panic at how obviously poor he was when suddenly Merlin’s hand curled around the back of Arthur’s neck. Arthur’s lips parted with a gasp and then Merlin was pressing his own against them, his tongue plunging inside. Arthur felt dizzy all over again and didn’t want Merlin’s lips to ever leave him, but too soon it was over and Merlin was pulling away.

“Wh-What,” Arthur stuttered. “What was that for?”

Merlin rolled his eyes. “Please, Arthur. You’ve been staring at my lips since you first saw me.”

&&&&

One role in a porn video had been enough money to keep Arthur in his flat about one more month. He still went without breakfast—and usually without lunch, to be honest—but he had no longer been on the verge of eviction. He could even manage to focus more on his classes and earned better marks than he had in a long time (though a certain boyfriend was probably somewhat responsible for that).

Then, as he was nearing the end of his funds yet again, he had begun to worry. He’d told Merlin he didn’t want to do another scene because he only wanted to be with Merlin, and Merlin, being the supportive partner that he was, understood. He even came up with an idea.

Freya had left in the portion with Merlin preparing Arthur because it was “realistic, and there’s just not enough of that in porn these days,” so the premise had changed to a straight boy having his first gay fuck. The video itself earned the title of “Straight Blond Loses Arse Virginity to Hung Twink,” and apparently, people had really liked watching it. Apparently—though Arthur sure didn’t know this until Merlin told him—Freya had asked Merlin if Arthur wanted to come back and shoot a few more. Merlin had declined, of course, because he knew Arthur, and knew that Arthur hated the fact that he'd had to put himself out there once already.

But if Arthur was serious about not wanting to rely on Merlin’s income alone—"You’re more than welcome to move in, Arthur, you know that.”—there was always the option to fuck on camera again. Not some other random bloke, but him, _Merlin_. They’d do what they normally did in the bedroom, only for an audience.

So Arthur agreed to do a few more. He and Merlin made some of their own homemade videos and uploaded them to a few websites to see if there was still a fanbase. There was.

People loved watching Arthur take Merlin’s huge cock. Merlin was good at fucking, and Arthur, though he could still hardly believe it, was good at getting fucked. That wasn’t to say Arthur didn’t top a few times, as well. He still had desires and Merlin’s arse was just _so_ pretty. But to not let Merlin put that cock of his to good use...that would just be a shame.

The only problem that came out of the whole ordeal was Gwaine. He was absolutely, intolerably smug.


End file.
